Dear A,

So my three year old is finally potty trained. And not potty trained like he goes on the mini-toilet. But real-life potty trained, like he goes where my ass goes and every time he gets on I pray he doesn't fall in. Anyway, he has started to identify his shit. "That's a turtle." "Look, there's a snake." "It's a snail." I'm a little mortified, but also a little impressed at his creativity. I mean, if we can give credit to kids who look at clouds and see elephants and lollipops, then why can't we give kudos to my kid who sees Mickey Mouse in his shit? He just might be the next American genius.

Love, D